As we begin a historic new Ballwasher Year it is important that we all recognize the recent passing of a great Ballwasher, Doug O'Hara. He was only 59 years old. Doug is now our second deceased Ballwasher, and I'm sure he's riding a golf cart with Bill Miller in a better place.But there is also some good news as we've purged our ranks of two DoucheBags, J. Burke & J.
DeLong, leaving us more pure than when the year began. J. Burke & J. DeLong are guilty of High DoucheBaggery for speaking disparagingly of the Ballwashers, and for sucking the life out of our League. They are now banished to the DoucheBag category of despair.I'm advised that other League members also now ride on the brink of DoucheBaggery, and I advise that you mend your ways before it is too late for you, too!
And there is MORE good news to share!
I spoke with our contact at Thousand Islands Country Club (TICC) and we are now locked-in for TWO DAYS of GOLF (Friday/Saturday) on June 8-9, 2007, in Alexandria Bay. They will provide us with Breakfast, Greens Fees and Cart each day, and we now know that we're scheduled to play the "Old Course" on Friday, June 8, and the "Lake Course" on Saturday, June 9. We're still working out lunch logistics. Tee-times are 10:30am each day.
Our contact at TICC recommended that we give serious consideration to staying at The Ship Motel if we want a good central location from which to wander the streets of Alex Bay at night. He ALSO pointed out that The Ship's owner is Mr. Pat Simpson, the Mayor of Alex Bay!! I'm waiting to hear back from Pat to see what kind of group deal he can offer the Ballwashers.MEANWHILE, it's now time for YOU to start setting expectations as you plan your attendance in our FIRST Ballwasher AlexBay Golf Outing! Remember our naming convention to help guide you:
- Admiral #1: 3 Nites lodging (Thur-Sat), 2 days Golf (Fri/Sat)
- Admiral #2: 2 Nites lodging (Fri-Sat), 2 days Golf (Fri/Sat)
- Captain #1: 2 Nites lodging (Fri-Sat) and 1 day Golf (Sat)
- Captain #2: 1 Nite lodging (Fri or Sat) and 1 day Golf (Sat)
- Lubber: NO lodging, 1 day Golf (Sat)
- DoucheBag: No Lodging, No Golf - Who let you into this League??
All you DISTANT Ballwashers, this is the event to attend. If flying in, Syracuse is probably the airport to use.
There will be more news to share in coming weeks. I hope to start hearing from you soon! Remember, don't be a DoucheBag!
-Nort
5 comments:
Nort if you kick people out of
league just because they think
you are a 'tool', there will be
no one left.
Hey anonymous,
Don't be such a fucking pussy. If you're man enough to call me a tool then be man enough to identify yourself. For your information I don't just sit around banishing worthless Ballwashers to the DoucheBag realm. The league leadership (those who actually CARE about the Ballwashers) contacted me personally to let me know that these Ballwashers need to go. I checked with Willie and he gave his confirmation.
So if you think I'm a "tool" then that's OK because tools are used for fixing things, and if I can help to make the Ballwashers a better organization by my efforts then I'm satisfied. What the fuck have you done to advance the Ballwasher cause other than whine, DoucheBag??
-Nort
To set the record straight:
we did "not" say anything
disparagingly about the League.
However we did object to the shirts
because we feel a League shirt
should be something you want to
wear in public.
Burke and DeLong
You’re calling Burke and Delong douche bags? This comes from someone whose interests are UFO’s, belly dancing, renaissance fairs, towelettes and hypnosis. This same somebody, we’ll call him ‘Snort’ to protect this persons identity, also considers himself somewhat of a fashion buff. After seeing the shirts he designed with a gay pirate asking for a moist towelette to lube up his ass, I beg to differ. Who is ‘Snort’ to comment on commitment of a ballwashers? Where have you been for the past 15 years? You are a completely immature in handling of this matter. Nobody ever confronted Burke or Delong on this issue. Instead, ‘Snort, the coward that he is, decides to do this through the safety and comfort of his blog from Virginia. Was this whole thing spurred on because you can’t take criticism about your bad taste in fashion design and peoples unwillingness to give out their email address? Who wants to get spammed everyday from THE DOUCHE of them all, ‘Snort’?
Look, you homo,
Talk about being a coward...once again some dickless freak decides to anonymously impugn my good name. Don't talk to me about cowardice unless you attach your name to your words.
Apparently you can't read either. I wonder what you can actually do other than whine like a baby. Waaah, Waaah, Waaah!! If you read my Feb 1 response you'd realize they came to ME to drum you out of our League. I took no action to make the announcement until I received confirmation from Willie himself. There are still two others on "probation" who don't even know about it yet because Willie said to give it time and see whether they should be allowed to remain or not.
Plus, I'm starting to wonder about your fascination with me. Clearly you've decided that it's very important to know as much as you can about me. You WISH you were me, asswipe! I don't need your misguided adoration...go suck someone else's dick. Maybe, if you suck hard enough, this could be an effective strategy for you to get a dick of your own.
I also find it funny that you call me immature. Of course I am, you dimwit! If you want a MATURE golf league go someplace else. Actually, the desire for you to do that is really at the heart of the matter.
Look, we are the Ballwashers, not the Ballwhiners. Just go away already.
-Nort
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